No, I’m not thinking really hard about a corn dog; it’s just what happens with my congenital ear gap in pictures sometimes. The fact that it works out anyway, though, is what makes me magic.
Parking can be a real chore here, but we still made it in time for the shows we wanted to see. After all, who doesn’t enjoy Chinese acrobats doing scary, unsettling things with their frightfully limber bodies?
No photography allowed inside the 3D theater for Al’s Brain, but they didn’t say anything about outside! We take our victories where we can get ’em.
Afterwards, I was ready to stretch my paws a bit and hit the midway. Rob wouldn’t let me do the game with ping-pong balls because he said he’d just end up taking care of the goldfish, which...is true. So I chucked some darts at balloons and won him a bear instead. He can’t complain if I give him something that’s in his school colors, right?
Snacktime! You can find pretty much any kind of regular food here—tacos, tempura, turkey legs, you name it—but why order that when fair cuisine is special in its own right? I can have Chateaubriand anytime; today it’s all about the apple fries and chocolate-covered bacon!
And if that’s not wrong enough for you: one Coronary Combo, please!
Seriously, “Coronary Combo.” It’s right there at the bottom.
Obviously, the next step is hopping off all those calories, so let’s go see some exhibits! The line for the ice sculpture collection was out the door, but hey, who wouldn’t want to see a giant block of ice chainsawed and chiseled into the Mona Lisa? I wonder if there’s a huge igloo somewhere with a full reproduction of the Sistine Chapel etched into its ceiling...
And if ice art alone doesn’t illustrate the crazy things humans can do with enough time on their (admittedly useful) hands, how about The Birth of Venus rendered in butter? Although frankly, it’s hard to think of a dairy-fat Botticelli as anything but campy, however well done it may be.
On the other paw: rabbits made from pretzels = high art.
They just are, is all.
Next up: the livestock area.
Okay, I see the bacon, but when do they cover it in chocolate?
Hey, cutie. Got plans after the fair? You’re so much better than this whole scene, you know.
She ended up blowing me off. Oh well, carny girls aren’t for life anyway.
And right next to the livestock is the agricultural section—complete with a scarecrow! Do note that there is no such thing as a “scarerabbit.” You know what scares a rabbit? Audits.
By nightfall, I’m ready for dessert! Specifically, a red velvet cupcake with buttercream icing and a big ol’ wad of cotton candy as a topping, and for a chaser, a frosting shot. Which is exactly what it sounds like. I love this place so much I could cry. And what sweet, sweet, sugary tears they would be.
Whew, what a day. Is there anything that I haven’t done? Oh yeah—a ride! Problem is, Rob’s not much of a ride person, and I can’t very well go without my cameraman—mainly because I can’t exactly manage the height requirement on my own. Hmm...
Well, we compromised on the ferris wheel, the big wuss. The line and the loading each took longer than the ride itself, but the view of the fairground from up top was nice. What we could see of it through the graffiti-scarred window, anyway.
Exit churro. Now my fair experience is complete.
Oh, did I mention that the fair runs another two weeks? Looks like I’m coming back for seconds!
(Rob named the bear “Leland,” BTW.)
